Ok I actually have something to rant about

When people use fomo as an excuse it REALLY peeves me off. Others are allowed to have lives and you have yours. Throughout highschool besides the big things i almost never hung out with anyone outside of school maybe 3 times max last year. And one on one that's an even differenter story. I only hung out one on one with my best friend, any others are an anomoly that I can count with one hand. And do you want to know a limiting factor? IT'S OTHER PEOPLE! When inviting people to do something you have to complete essentially a thesus paper to keep people happy if you aren't inviting everyone. Then if other people know about it that are the same closeness to you then you have to worry about them getting "FOMO" or whatever other mental deficieny they want to pull. And i knew that they would do stuff (given about as much as I with them) but I wouldn't sit there and urinate myself, i just know that people have LIVES TO LIVE THAT ARE NOT MINE. And so it ended up going both ways with me i barely asked to hang with them and they sparcely asked me, and they about never asked each other. But that makes sense in a way because we would be intertwined 6/5 with each other every day that the weekends would be a break from each other. Which could also just reflect on the relationship and be another of the reasons that i should have dropped them sooner. But anyhow if i am with someone and you have to make it a talking point to make us feel like you should have been there, I AM SO SORRY BUT NO ONE CARES. We didn't intentionally exclude you there was just something being done. And maybe I just need to learn to not be stepped all over which is true anyway.  Ok i have realised this needs to be split into 2 categories. 1) how people weaponise their presense 2) how my previous friend group did not normalise NORMAL HUMAN interaction leaving me Stunted socially. Going through point 2, I believe as a person I grew a little too close to my group that i missed things in high school that should have taught me how to be a normal person. And now i am supplementing that by hanging out with adults twice my age every sunday and playing board games. But that doesn't help either because they aren't my peers, theyre adults with kids and Families. I've never had a kid not a mid life crisis. What am i supposed to do complain about car insurance? Yeah... I should have Branched out more, and i did it was just too late atp. So yeah, thank you to my previois group for making me unable to function! 💕 So because of this normalisation I have a hard time asking people to hang out in smaller groups because if i wanted to get sonething done I (me) had to organise it, and it did not feel acceptable to ask people to hang out one on one, so the net it was trying to balance everyone 😝. But with and massive majority of interactions i have been the one to ask and it gets tiering because without anyone else asking it just feels like they are obliged to say yes to me even if they don't want to. So I am so happy to finally be a part of people who actually take some initiative into planning things to do, hopefully i can learn a grow to be better and just recharge after whatever has happened over the past 5 years. Back to point 1 maybe I have not experienced the worst of fomo because i don't recall a time where i felt the sting of being intentionally left out in a bad way. It just helps to know that you are not me and i am not you,  and that there will always be a next time. I am young and can do whatever i need, and I can make my own next time! So just finding a bit more contentment in your Situation goes a long way. Thank you to my New peeps for making me actually enjoy company and let's try to last longer than the end of next semester. I do hope you enjoyed this wall of text because i cannot be asked to separate it as i feel it is just too smooth as is. Why break apart one run on sentence of brain leak. So the Lesson to take from this is have a feel of perspective in the lense of other people and there is always tomorrow you just need to make it!